Juli 31, 2009

Communiqué 6


People of Uribistan! Your Comrade and Leader is speaking here, not for me alone, but as the Voice of our People's Council and also as the Voice of our great People's Republic! In economic way we made a big step forwards! Our social system develops, and in the streets, in our cities, villages and in the country we only find healthy, happy people! But: there are forces in our country, many of them coming from abroad, trying to bring chaos, civil war and criminal-capitalism!

It was a good idea to give those people with great interests in our great civilisation, in our history and culture, a possibility to learn our oldest (some say also 'most secret', but this is reactionary mystification!) cultural technique: Kamel Sutré. But what happens? It is an oversexed popular bingo-show! We don't want to be a second Thailand, Ukraine, Las Vegas or Mega-Reeperbahn on a Bohlen-level! It was a very good action of mister Mat Gundo, he did with the cuckooisation of the First Public Kamel Sutré days. But we are very disappointed with mister Murat Tchundyks action on the Terra Canaillo site! There is only one solution to give unity to our great nation: THE KAMEL SUTRÉ DAYS ARE OVER! We will finish this mess immediately!
If Murat Tchundyk appears somewhere in our country or tries to come back in Uribistan, he will be arrested! We give 250.000 UR$ to everybody who brings this man to our Gouvernment!

From now on, in every big city with more as 25.000 inhabitants, it is forbidden to go in groups of more as 3 persons. You can go in your streets from 6.30 AM in the morning, until 19.00 PM in the evening. If you go on streets before or after this time, you are arrested! But: keep calm, stay in peace, and nothing severe happens with you! Only those elements, who want to destroy our nation must take attention, I just say to them: your time is over, you are done! Victory to the People of Uribistan, your Comrade an Leader Chök Hak.

Juli 29, 2009

IMPORTANT NOTICE FROM OUR MINISTRY OF TOURISM AND MIN. OF SECURITY!!


DEAREZT READERZ ANDA PEOPLEZ WHO LIKE TO VISIT OUR BELOVED URIBISTAN AND THE KAMEL SUTRÉ DAYZ! After some interaction with touristz, fanz anda new foreign inhabitantz of The Free anda EverYoung People's Republic of Uribistan (FEPRU) - our Ministers of Tourist Affairz anda also of Security Affairz have ordered to change our picturez! Ofcourse they lika Kamel Sutré (don't say it loud: they are not so very educated in thiz method!), but, so they say, those Indian kama sutra picz can attract the wrong peoplez to Uribistan. They don't wanna hava new Thailand here. They showed us letters from good fanz of us, they wrote, it is lida bit oversexy here! Our great leader Chök Hak also was very upset about the islamic gay kama sutra picz! The Ministry of Tourism wants us to make good picturez of Kamel Sutré, not such profane ones of the Kama Sutra. So, we have to do thiz: we changed the picz below, now there are real fine picturez for meditation anda concentration about time. Thiz is necessary entering the practice of the Real Kamel Sutré. Overstreamingz, Mat Gundo

Juli 25, 2009

WHAT ABOUT INCREASING VIRILITY ANDA CONSUMPTION OF CAMEL STEAKS? AND: GARDEN OF EDEN SITUATED IN THE URIBI HIGHLANDZ!

Mat Gundo Reportz! Dearezt readers in our wide, good, beautiful and beloved Earth! Yes, todays public Kamel Sutré Days 2009 here in Uribistan make us very, very happy! Lotz of peoplez arrived in our country. And lotz of them, for the firzt time, they hava real Uribi experiencez. There is so much to see, so much to know about our people, about our history, politix anda spirituality! It is not only to say 'Magash' but also to say: 'Vânu Uribistan' (I like Uribistan!) anda thousand otha wordz in our olde language.
Ofcourse, this happens, there ara some stories about Uribi traditionz, which should be examined carefully! For example this one: eating camel steakz is very good for you, as a man you can increase your virility practicing Kamel Sutré. And indeed: we saw the firzt Europeanz (like Don Micele, hiz doggydog Lichtning Boy and even Green Lida River!) consumating Uribi poundz of camelmeat (ofcourse with literz of good Uribi beer!). Sorry boyz: thiz is not the truth! Thiz is a fairy tale in Uribistan, even HH. Murat Tchundyk believes in it (hohoho, sorry Murie, I must laugh her) - he comes from the Lowlandz. In the L owlandz peoplez believe this!
It is the following thingy: all fairytailz, all kindz of folktalez, have their originz in the real spiritual worldz!
Kamel Sutré is very, very olde. This technicz exists long before everything we know as kama sutra anda stuff like that. Kamel Sutré is made in very olde timez, in timez everything was aerogonous anda fluid. Timez, which are described in good bookz from our highezt spiritual shaman of the 20th century, here you can buy them (you can reada them in Djerman!). In those timez, first the human beingz became more anda more distance to the godz. Anda to come in contact with the godz they used Kamel Sutré. Ofcourse notice: everything was swinging in fluid elementz, our shapez were changing constantly! And then, at a sudden time, big crash came: being one human being before, now we were man anda woman. You can read thiz story here (in English) anda here (again some info in Djerman!) anda here interesting study about ideas of creation anda also dance (anda Kamel Sutré is kinda holy dance!).
Well, in this olde timez, after the separation of man anda woman, Kamel Su tré developed a new aspect: finding togetha, man anda woman in act of Kamel Sutré being one again anda in this state reaching world of godz anda saying 'hello' to godz. Yes, reaching paradise again. Anda, you can already guess: for all peoplez looking for the right place of the Garden Eden, it was not in Irak, not in Iran, it was anda it is, till now, in the Highlandz, in our beloved Uribistan! Adam and Eve are the firzt Uribi people!
Doing Kamel Sutré in a world slowly getting harder anda more fixed, our Adams anda Eves were looking for a nice soft underlay to do Kamel Sutré. In that times there was a lovely soft coated animal with beautiful eyes. Anda all the Eves liked to do Kamel Sutré with all the Adams on the back of this animal. In those times, as earth was getting harder, but everything was much more plastically as today (it is impossible to compare those times with our world today), after every Kamel Sutré session the straight back of our beloved animal was lida bit busted. In those days of plasticity it was no problem, but, after thousand of yearz, earth became fixed, the back of the animal kept busted.
What about the name of the animal? Well, if one of the Adams asked one of the Eves to make Kamel Sutré with him, he said something lika this (remember: in this beginning world, he did not spoke in the way we are doing today): 'Eve, let us do the camel.' And in all those years, it became the name of our animal: 'Camel'. So again you can see, it's the truth, written in the Bible: (Gen 2:19-20) '..and Adam gave names to all cattle..'
Now, dear reade r, you know the connection, this long and deep history, between Kamel Sutré and our dear camel. After thousandz of yearz the common inhabitantz of Uribistan forgot this, only a few highland adepts could give this knowledge from one generation to the other, by hearing it, by having an akasha experience, by doing Kamel Sutré. As a tribute to our camel, in the higher degreez of Kamel Sutré we are sitting on a soft camel coat. The story about eating camel steakz to increase our virility is a mistake! It is Uribi Lowland folktale!
At last, I have to unveil anotha great Uribi secret, it is only for you, tourist in Uribistan: if you want to eat a good camelsteak in Uribistan, just visit HH Murat Tchundyk - he will bless you, and his beautiful wife makes the best camel steaks of our beloved nation!
(you can make clicks on the pics to increase them. Look good at them, anda you find also real surprise!)

Juli 22, 2009

Love Matrix Meditation for the Kamél Sutre Days 2009 in Upper Uribistan


Dearest lovely Anthropsfy Blogheads,
here isa for ya the soundtrack for the Kamél Sutre days 2009. It isa also a journey into the past of Uribistan and how our beloved Country and nation hasa developed into Hotistan. Georgie Boy loves ita here and he is aspiring togetha witha Mat Gundo our fabulous national Shaman to a great Uribi shaman. Camelsteaks definetly strengthen your virility and clairvoyance!
Stay tuned and drop out into the spiritual depths of the secrets of the higher worlds.
Magash!!!!! I love ya all my disciples!!!!!
Big licking kissas all over ya faces
His Holine$$
Murat Joy Tchundyk (your Guru guiding you gently through the CRISIS and judgnent day)

KAMEL SUTRÉ DAYS 2009 - ENJOY IT!

Juli 20, 2009

NO MONEY? NO IDEAS? BEING FUCKED UP? JUST VISIT URIBISTAN AND YOUR MIND IS FLOATING!

We enjoy it, to present a new great endorser of Uribi musix, instrumentz, history, nature & all kinds of spiritz! We are happy to hava former president Bush in Uribistan.
Note for all Uribiheadz: after a long time in underground, in Hamasheyk, Europe, US of A and in otha worldz, I'm back here again! With Chök Hak & his companionz we could maka big deal. I'm very happy to be here again, makin' new experimentz in our institute, being in our new Uribi Shaman Council, doin' lotz of Kamel Sutré, having every wednesday great diner with Murat anda some times writing again in our fantastic Uribistan Daily! With lotz of overstreamingz, Mat Gundo.

Juli 17, 2009

Love and be loved in return


Dearest lovely anthropsfyblogheads,
recently i walked through the backstreets of Hamasheyk anda I heard beautiful music by some of our immigrants. They donta hava money buta they looka happy. " Money is the root ofa all evil." They definetly are nota evil these boys, next day I wanta to hire them fora alittle family party buta they lefta Hamasheyk, probably up into Uribi Highlands to be part ofa the shamanistic human experiments of the biological Cybernetic Institute of Hamasheyk. They hava to swallow extracts ofa morning glory and then they hava to report ofa experience to Mat Gundo. One Uribi Dollar per day nota bad. Half of ita they send to families in Djermanistan.
Let us love our Uribi Immigrants in return. Da ya need a band for ya party?
His Holiness
Murat Joy Tchundyk

Juli 15, 2009

Breaking the Silence


Hier noch ein interessantes Interview von Jon Snow von Channel 4 GB. Click here!

"There is no decent place to stand in a massacre" Leonard Cohen

H:F:

Juli 12, 2009

Rastaman, Neckerman, Mannesman Happy holidays


Dearest Uribi Blogheads,
we wisha ya Happy Holidays, nexta Jahr noch weita bisa nach Uribistan.
His Holiness
Murat Joy Tchundyk